A Police Officer’s Simple Safety Tips That Could Save Your Life

Episode Description - Safety Tips for Before, During and After Divorce

What would you do if your personal safety was at risk? Do you even know what you would do? What if implementing a few simple safety tips could make a BIG difference in how safe you and your children were on an ongoing basis?

This podcast episode takes a deep dive into practical safety strategies with Catherine Trimboli, a seasoned law enforcement professional turned personal protection advocate. Catherine shares how she empowers high-level women to feel secure through situational awareness, safety planning, and discrete security services. With her background as a law enforcement captain with 30 years of experience Catherine is particularly well-poised to share practical advice and real-world safety tips on everything from avoiding dangerous encounters to safeguarding yourself when traveling, and more.

She also shares how you can empower your children through safety education, without making them feel so bold that they put themselves in harm’s way.

From maintaining privacy about your whereabouts to implementing strategies for safe social interactions, Catherine’s safety tips are a blueprint for safeguarding peace of mind no matter who or where you are.

Show Notes

About Catherine
Catherine Trimboli - Retired Boss Lady / Personal Protector Concierge. As a retired Law Enforcement Captain with over 30 years of experience, Catherine is now channeling her expertise into launching a personal protection business for your peace of mind. Her focus is on providing discreet, high-level security services tailored to women and children. With a deep understanding and commitment to confidentiality and personalized safety planning, she offers practical solutions to help individuals feel empowered, safe, and secure in their daily lives. As a driven professional with a servant-leadership approach, she leads with purpose, and passion, always striving to uplift and inspire those around her. Her mission is to deliver trusted protection with the same integrity and dedication that guided her law enforcement career.

Connect with Catherine
You can connect with Catherine on LinkedIn at Catherine Trimboli to stay updated on her latest projects, professional insights, and industry expertise. Whether you're looking to network, collaborate, or simply follow her career journey, her profile offers a great opportunity to engage. Don’t hesitate to send her a message or request to connect—she’s always open to meaningful conversations and expanding her professional network.

Key Takeaways From This Episode with Cathy

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Transcript

A Police Officer's Simple Safety Tips That Could Save Your Life

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

 safety, safety tips, awareness, intuition, trust

SPEAKERS

Karen Covy, Catherine Trimboli

Karen Covy Host

00:02

Hello and welcome to Off the Fence, a podcast where we deconstruct difficult decision-making to try to figure out what keeps us stuck and, more importantly, how do we get unstuck. I'm your host, Karen Covy, a former divorce lawyer, mediator and arbitrator, turned coach, author and entrepreneur.

With me today is Catherine Trimboli. Catherine is a retired law enforcement captain, a boss lady and a personal protector concierge. As a retired law enforcement captain with over 30 years of experience, Catherine currently channels her expertise into a personal protection business aimed at giving her high-level female clients peace of mind. She focuses on providing discreet, high-level security services tailored specifically to women and children. Catherine taught defense tactics for many years at the Milwaukee County Training Academy and she has a deep understanding and commitment to confidentiality and personalized safety planning. And commitment to confidentiality and personalized safety planning. Catherine offers practical solutions to help individuals feel empowered, safe and secure in their daily lives. Her mission is to deliver trusted protection with integrity and dedication, and Catherine also runs the Milwaukee County Shop with a Cop, which is a not-for-profit organization.

Catherine, welcome to the show.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

Thank you for having me.

Karen Covy Host

I'm excited. I've never talked to someone like you on the podcast before, so I am really excited for this conversation, and especially because at the time we're recording this, it's October, which is Domestic Violence Month, and I think the tips that you're going to share here, you know, based on our knowing each other and conversation, are going to be invaluable for so many people. But before we get into that, I want to wind it back and ask can you tell me a little bit about your background in law enforcement and how it led you into this personal safety and protection gig?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

02:06

Sure. So I started in law enforcement right out of high school. Didn't think that that's where I was going to go in life. You know I had. I knew that I always wanted to do something to help people. But it was a series of things that occurred and I ended up starting at a very young age. And as I went through, there were times when I was the only female working. I remember on the freeway, on third shift, a couple of times when I was a deputy, that I was the only female working and I was like this is interesting. But you know, as time has evolved, a lot more females are joining law enforcement, which is awesome.

02:49

So I just retired a couple months ago and I knew that there was something more. I could feel that there was something that I wanted to do that was pulling me to helping. You know, I have a servant leadership, you know persona anyway, and I've always loved to serve and help people. So I felt like it kept pulling me to this.

03:12

I knew that I wanted to help women because I would talk to a lot of the women and ladies that I would come in contact with, whether they were on the job or off the job, and sometimes like the confidence would be lacking job, or they didn't have the understanding or the wherewithal of how to you know simple things that they could do to protect themselves or, to, you know, carry on in their daily lives at a higher level and have a peace of mind. So I really had a passion, drive for helping people and I was a law enforcement trainer for many years and doing different what's called principles of subject control, which is basically defense tactics and some communication, and I think all of that couples into giving women and empowering women, giving them the knowledge and tools that they need that can really transform their confidence and their sense of well-being.

Karen Covy Host

04:06

That's awesome and I know that you know. Whether a woman is married, single, divorced doesn't really make any difference. If you're in a bad situation, you're in a bad situation and personally I know I may get a lot of flack for this, you know, but I don't care what you see in the movies about this little, tiny, petite little woman who takes out like a dozen big burly guys. In real life that does not happen and it's certainly not going to happen for me. I'm like you can't tell, but I'm not very big. And so if somebody is, if there's a woman and she's worried about her personal safety, her protection, what realistically can she and should she do to make sure that she is safe, that she doesn't get in that bad situation, because the chances of her actually taking out the dozen burly guys is not good, Right?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

05:02

So everyone has some type of some level of self-awareness, right, so you can feel things that are going on around you and you have an awareness of what's happening. Right, in law enforcement we have something called situational awareness and a lot of other areas use it to the term, but it basically is observing and being present, but observing and then taking from that observation and making a decision and then taking a proper action, basically, right. So we always say head on a swivel, like you will notice that a lot of law enforcement or military, but a lot of law enforcement. If you're having a conversation with somebody, they'll be looking around the room and it's not because they're not listening to you, they're scanning the room, they're checking to see who's walking in, like they're taking inventory, so to speak.

06:01

Right, but in everyday lives, like citizens can do that easily, where they, you know, just take a quick glance, see what's going on, who's there, what if something seems out of place or doesn't seem right and listen to your instincts? Like the little hairs on the back of your head stand up, or you get that little flip in your gut where, like something is not right here. We, I think, take for granted our intuition and honestly, like that is like when you're really in tune with your intuition. You're like, okay, something didn't seem right about that, you know. It's like the I'm a good judge of character kind of thing right, like it's being able to all right, take that. And then a lot of times it's like how you stand, how you carry yourself, you know, if you walk into a room confident or you're walking down the street by yourself and you look confident and your head's not in your phone and you're not, you don't look like you're lost. A lot of times people are going to leave you alone.

Karen Covy Host

06:58

Okay, so there's a lot there to unpack. I want to dive into the whole idea of situational awareness. What are you looking for? Like I can look around the room and what will should I be paying attention to? That might tip me off, as you know, to there's a problem here or something's not right. I mean, it's one thing to have the gut feeling. It's another thing to be able to look at something and know, oh yeah, that's off.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

07:28

Right, I mean, I think sometimes situational awareness too is just, you are seeing, like, oh, that person walked in the room there. Oh, that's a bright outfit, you know. So, if something happens right, and that person did it, they're like, yeah, I remember seeing a guy walk in. He had a bright orange shirt on and his you know, he had a face, such and such baseball cap on. You know things like that, right, they say be a good witness, like that's a term we've used to be a good witness. So like scanning the room.

07:58

If we're scanning the room for threats, that's a different level, right, but just being aware and seeing what's you know, being observant. But again, to answer your question, if there's something doesn't feel right, what are we looking for? You know, it depends where you are. Let's say you're in a restaurant and somebody walks in and something doesn't seem right. Right, somebody is a little like agitated, or they seem like real nervous, or something like that. We don't know what's gonna happen, but at least you can keep an eye on it and see. I mean, it could be that they're just you know they're there and looking for somebody that you know shouldn't be there, or something like that.

Karen Covy Host

08:40

Yeah, I. Just that brings to mind a situation I got myself in back in the day when I was young and stupid. So I was traveling all around the world by myself, because, you know, I was 21 and I could do that Right, which retrospectively might not have been the best idea, but I was doing it anyway. And so I was in a European country I won't get into which one and I this was back in the day, when you actually could meet people on the street, right. So I was walking around. Some guy comes up, we start chatting, we go for a coffee.

09:13

I'm watching him drink the coffee and his hand is going like this and there's, all of a sudden, there's this intensity about him and, like you said to your point, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up and, at least because I was a woman traveling alone, I had enough sense to know, pay attention and I'm like, ok, we got to ditch this guy because whatever is going on here isn't good. When I ultimately was able to lose him in a crowd or something which he wasn't happy about, but I was thrilled, so things like that. What if a woman is out on a date with some guy, or she's alone with a person that she doesn't know, other than having, you know, like the shaky coffee, because he can't keep his hand? Still, what should she be looking for? What are the tells? what should she be looking for?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

10:04

I think, first, if you, if they're going somewhere that let's say a first date, right, we're going somewhere they haven't been before, or with somebody they haven't been before, I always say, you know, let somebody know, let them know where you are, and you might even need, like the keyword, if you're trying to get out of that date, where you run to the bathroom and you quick text them something and then they call and act like there's an emergency, so you can leave the situation right, like you can tell a friend, call me and pretend like whatever somebody got no car accident and be like oh my God, I'm so sorry I got to go, it was great to meet you like and fly out of there, right, but, um, you know, if you set some expectations or boundaries with this person, you know, and you there's, you know if they're saying things that that trigger you the wrong way or that you don't like, or that you don't care for, you could say you know, I would prefer that. You know, I don't like that, that type of talk, I don't like you talking to me that way, such, you know, whatever term you use. And then if they continue. You know there's always, you can always get up and leave, right, there's always a way out.

11:12

But things like that, or if they're starting to act a little nervous or weird, you know, if you're if God forbid you're at their house or you go back to their place and you really don't know them and they're making drinks, like you know, if you're unsure, like do you want to really take, have drinks with this person or take drinks from them? So it's little things like that that I think you know we just become more aware of, like have, taking the assessment and saying, okay, let's, you know, let's, let's think about this a little bit further, right?

Karen Covy Host

11:46

Yeah, yeah. I think a lot of the answer is don't put yourself in bad positions to begin with, right, but I like your idea of you know, if you are going out with somebody you don't know really well, to have a friend tipped off. This is, this is where I'm going, this is who I'm going with. Call me at this time. Or you can text them in the bathroom and say you know, hey, call me because I'm in a bad spot.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

12:17

Right. I mean, some people would just say I'm leaving, or they'd say they're going to go to the bathroom and they'll just leave, which is an option too, you know.

Karen Covy Host

12:26

Yeah, it's a little bit rude, but it's better than being taken advantage of.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

12:32

You know, sometimes they don't always reach to that level. It's just being observant, you know, being present, understanding what's happening, things like that.

Karen Covy Host

12:42

Tell me, like because a lot, of, a lot of women there I deal with, a lot of people going through divorce, obviously, and there are certain times that tend to be more volatile than others, like in the beginning and when you're having the first conversation of I want a divorce, right, If somebody's in that situation where they're about to tell their spouse they want a divorce and they're not sure of what the reaction is going to be and they're worried that maybe divorce and they're not sure of what the reaction is going to be and they're worried that maybe it could go south on them, what should they do? What you know, like, do they have their phone program for 9-1-1? Do they have, like, what do they do to make sure that if things do go badly, they can be safe?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

13:24

Well, again, it's like having a buddy right, like letting somebody know listen, this is what I'm going to do. Um, you know, if the relationship up until then you didn't have that feeling that you needed somebody there to tell them that, okay, but still let one of your friends or somebody that you confide in know this is what I'm going to do. And if it goes bad, you know I may be calling you for sure the phone, but honestly, our phones are so great. Now all you have to do is, like press and hold one of the side buttons. I'm sure we've all done it accidentally and it already. It calls 9-1-1, right, um, but also just making sure you have things in place, or a, so to speak, an out where if something does go bad, you can leave and if it gets that bad, you could always call the police and say, look, you know, this is what happened, you know.

14:12

But I mean, I think, for individuals I think they don't think about, like, how they can enhance their safety is sometimes just doing an assessment of your house, right, like look around, say okay, in, after they get to the next step of, after they tell them, and then it's a volatile or it's unpredictable, an unpredictable thing, right? And they're like I don't know if this guy's going to come over. I already changed the locks, okay, so do your doors and your windows lock?  Is it well lit? Do your motion lights work? Do you have cameras, and is it worth investing in them? Does your ring doorbell work and is it up to date? Like where it's recording, like some of them will work, where it'll give you an alert when someone's at your door. But if it's not up, if it's not updated or it's not connected to your internet the right way, it won't continue to record. And then that you know you might want that you might need that video at some point, right? So when you're driving, you take the same route every day? You only know one way to and from, let's say, work or your children's school or wherever you're going, because first there always should be two or three routes that you do know, but also because then you're unpredictable. You don't want to be predictable, right? They say if it's predictable, it's preventable. So I think Gordon Graham used to say that. But you're taking the same route every day. Someone's going to know where to find you at what time, right. But also it's good to have it in case of emergency not your emergency, let's say there's a crash or there's a fire or something's going on.

15:55

We used to do on the freeway we would always have traffic. When I worked on the freeway as a deputy, as a sergeant, as a lieutenant and as a captain, we would have dignitary escorts, right. So dignitary protection. The president, vice president, somebody would come in and we would have all these traffic closures right. Or even for festivals, like when there's a big festival going on, we would close the freeways and the ramps going into downtown, the, you know the, the, the cones and the car, the squad cars set out and so people can't get off on that ramp. And they would.

16:32

It was like clockwork. We would always have at least three or four people stop and say this is the only way. I know how to go. And I'm like okay, I'm sorry, but you can't go this way, keep going. You can get off on the next exit and then figure your way around. Or someone would say I have to go this way and I'm like but it's closed down and you know, at the time the officers don't have the time or they can't leave their post to sit with you and give you directions on where you're going. You know what I mean. So it's just like having your it pre-programmed in your mind, like having a plan of oh I think this way I'm going to take this road and this way I might take this road. Well, sometimes you might have a restaurant or a coffee shop you've never seen before.

Karen Covy Host

17:12

I love that. I mean, honestly, it's something that I didn't think about to just have to not always do the same thing the same way at the same time and but you, you brought up something that's really interesting. You know, like, if you're picking up your kids from school, that you don't always take the same road at the same time. What should you be teaching your children? Like, married, single, divorced, doesn't matter. What kinds of things should you be teaching your children to help them enhance their own personal safety?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

17:46

So there's with children, there's a balance between awareness and empowerment, right. So I always like to focus on the positive anyway. But with children it's even easier, because then they, you know, I think they feel like it's a fun thing and you can make it fun, you can make it a game. Let's say you're in the house and you want to teach them a plan. I mean, I remember years ago and working with the fire department, a lot of them will have they do stuff where. Ok, this is the route that we are going to take, or this is what we're going to do if there's a fire, right.

18:16

You can do the same concept with if there's an emergency, whatever that emergency will be, even if it's somebody trying to get in the house Right, so you're teaching them skills, right, and if you tell them, hey, I'm teaching you some skills and you being protected or you having more skills is going to keep everybody safer.

18:37

And we're going to be a lot of role playing, right, so you can find and I'm sure you know you can go onto the internet or even chat GPT and find like a role play game to teach my kids how to, you know, get out of the house and you can turn it into a fun game night and then afterwards have like ice cream or something. But I mean just in general for teaching kids. I think it's important for them to understand that it's important to have a plan right and to have different routes and to learn different things, because it's expanding their skill set and communication is definitely key. But I think what we call in law enforcement we say, having a pre-planned practice response it's a tongue twister, but it's something that we always remembered, right? Pre-planned practice response. Sure enough, you're planning and you practice it a few times and now it starts to become easy and natural for you.

Karen Covy Host

19:44

But how about that? What you just said, that balance between you know, practice and safety and empowerment, because little kids like, depending on their age, they're like, yeah, I'm Superman, you don't want your six-year-old trying to take down, you know, an adult, when you know that's not going to go well because the six-year-old doesn't have the skill. So how do you empower them without going so far that they think they're Superman.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

20:11

I think teaching them when they're outside of the house, like making sure they understand the importance of keeping close to trusted adults there's safety in numbers staying with somebody else all the time, right, having a buddy, having you know, especially at a younger age, having a buddy or two safety in numbers, staying close to trusted adults, being aware of their surroundings, you know. Teaching them like be aware, right, because a lot of the kids will be like oh my god, did you see so-and-so? And they're like, no Like. And they were standing right next to them, right, because they're so in their little like they were having so much fun. They were in their own little world, which is great.

20:53

But like teaching them that being aware of their surroundings, that it's a skill and they're like learning. You're learning something and this is great because now it's going to be able to help you, right. And then teaching them what to do if they don't feel comfortable, right, making sure you have points there on what to do if they don't feel comfortable, if you, we you know the term see, if you see something, say something. So they could right they see something. They're like oh, that person is that. Look at that, the guy's over here, he looks weird, or you know whatever the case may be.

Karen Covy Host

21:25

But what happens if? Like? What should you tell your kids to do? Say, let's say that they're in a situation and they see something that they think is a little bit off? What kinds of steps should they follow? You know, because they're little people, right, so they don't have the strength and the power that an adult does. What kinds of safety steps should they take to get out of a difficult situation?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

21:52

I would say, first and foremost, leaving and finding a trusted adult. Right, going straight to a trusted adult, or going into the building.I mean, let's say they're at school in recess and they see something weird. Grab their friend, say hey, let's go over to Mrs So-and-so the teacher to let them know what's going on. Or to go inside where it's safe.

Karen Covy Host

22:14

Okay, that makes a lot of sense. And you also mentioned communication. What role does communication play in personal safety?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

22:40

I feel I've always been a firm believer that communication, but like transparency and being very clear and having clear set goals and expectations, like letting them know, say, hey, you know, how was school Good? No, it's like engaging Right and asking, engaging questions and then saying, hey, as you're driving out of the parking lot, hey, if somebody came up to you here, what would you do? You know, and using that just little tidbits, and they built, they build on each other and the next thing you know you have a skill set for them that they didn't even realize, that they learned or they built up and you feel better and you have an enhanced peace of mind because you realize that I just taught my kid like five skills and they didn't even, you know, they didn't even check it, they didn't even get that?

Karen Covy Host

23:23

Yeah, they didn't even realize I was teaching them you know which is right, which is beautiful, especially once they get to a certain age and they're just like mom, you know right, whatever. But what to do what? Speaking of age, how, how old should they be when you start to teach them things like this?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

23:43

I mean, I think with the games like you could start teaching them as soon as they get an understanding of you know that they're not supposed to answer the door when you know the doorbell rings and you don't know who's coming over. And you know what I mean, like whether that's three for some kids and whether it's five, six or seven for others. You know, I think the parent is the best gauge of the ability.

24:10

But I think, honestly, starting the role playing game you know the games at such a young age it's really teaching them the importance of you know being safe and not answering the door when you know you don't know who's coming to the door. I mean, I don't know how many people come to the door, ring people's doorbells anymore, or they look on the phone and they're like, oh, look who? The UPS man's at the door, amazon's at the door. Yeah, even if Amazon comes to the door, the kid shouldn't be answering the door. Let them drop off the package, let them leave, because you never know.  I'm not saying Amazon hires bad people, I'm just saying it's just something to keep in mind.

Karen Covy Host

24:56

Yeah, that makes total sense. We're not dissing any kind of drivers or what have you. But you know and it depends too, I mean, if mom and dad are home, it's different, or if you're, but if you're all by yourself, that you're right and you're a little person. You shouldn't just be like hanging out in the doorway with the delivery man Although some of them can be pretty cool. But I've seen the videos on social media, and some of them do fun things.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

25:24

So cool and so fun, or if they're like going to go dance with them, well, if your parents are home, hey, go have at it, yeah.

Karen Covy Host

25:31

Let's switch gears a little bit and go back to women. Let's say there's a woman who's traveling alone right, okay, should she be doing and being be aware of you know? Because let's say she's a professional speaker, she's going to a business conference or whatever. So she's flying to a new city, doesn't know the airport, doesn't know the city. Has to go from airport to hotel, to whatever, maybe going through some bad neighborhoods. What kinds of do you have any tips for women in that circumstance?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

26:08

I would definitely say they should have a check-in person, like the kids have the buddy right and let someone know when you leave and when you get there, right, first and foremost, and even in the Uber or whatever car service they're taking Uber, Lyft, or however they're getting to their destination, Be on the phone and speak as if oh, yeah, okay, so I'll meet you at the hotel. You know, even if they're in a different state, right, person doesn't have to know that because you never, you never know. You just want to be careful. You got to err on the side of caution, right.

26:40

But I think when traveling alone anyway, like if you're, if you're driving parking in a well-lit area, you get to pick your parking spot. You want to be as close to the door as possible, right? Or you know, you drive up to the hotel, you park your car at the little valet area. You run in, you check in, you ask them what's the best place to park?  I mean, they might even have somebody there that would, if you felt uncomfortable, that could come out, park your car for you, come out there, walk you in.

27:08

will never know if you don't ask, right? I always say if you don't ask, the answer is always no. So people are more willing to help than we think right. But I think that being again just being aware of your surroundings, looking around if you're traveling in an Uber and not keeping your head down in the phone, and then now you didn't even see what route they took, like you could have passed some places, that at least you have landmarks, and when you're going out the next day you're like oh yeah, I remember passing this place and I saw that it was near the convention center or what have you Right? And I think trusting your intuition, like really being aware, self-aware, having being observant, but trusting your instincts and I think that you know a lot of that just kind of comes together, you know.

Karen Covy Host

27:54

Yeah, that that makes a lot of sense. So you know, and when you, if somebody is traveling as a woman alone, should they always have that like somebody who knows where they're going, knows where they're staying, knows, like, do you have that person at home? And if that person at home thinks something's wrong, what do they do?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

28:18

Yeah, I mean if they, if they feel uncomfortable or they know you know if you're talking to somebody and something happens right and they know. Let's say I call you and you hear something on my end of the phone but you know where I'm either going to that I'm in that I got on the Uber at destination A and then I'm going to destination B. There's nothing wrong with calling that police department saying, hey, can you send a squad just to do a check to make sure she's okay? Maybe the phone just dropped, but it didn't sound right and there was a little bit of whatever in the background. Nine out of 10, they'll, depending on, like, the city or the agency, you know if they're not super busy, but nine out of 10 times they'll send someone out just to check, you know, to do a welfare check.

Karen Covy Host

29:02

Okay, so let's, let's get this sort of real and you know, for a moment, do you have any? Any examples or stories of people who were able to enhance their personal safety and therefore increase their peace of mind, by doing taking some simple steps?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

29:27

Actually, yeah, I mean that one thing that I didn't mention, or that we didn't get to yet, was one of the things with, let's say, you're going through a divorce, right, and it's unpredictable, and you're unsure what's happening. You know we went over, like the assessment of the house and the home, but what about work? You might not want to share at work what's going on at home. Most people don't, understandably so. But it's really, really recommended and it's really good to have a supervisor or somebody at a higher level that you can confide in, be completely transparent, say, look, I don't know what's going on, it's a little unpredictable. Some days he's up, some days he's down. Whatever the case may be, communicate what's happened, any things like if there was any threats, things like that. Then that way, and you can share a picture with them. Then that way they have a plan in place in case something happens.

30:21

We had an employee at work who was going through an unpredictable divorce and they shared with their supervisor what happened. They would walk to the car, but they just, you know, in law enforcement agencies you work every shift and then in the wintertime, like every shift has darkness in it. You're going to work at first shift, it's dark outside. You're coming home from work on second shift, you dark outside. You know what I mean. On third shift, it's always dark outside. Yeah, so you know, because with the, with the sun going down and what have you, but um, with that, they have to walk their car. They didn't feel comfortable. You know, if they didn't have somebody of like, they could ask their friends hey, can, can you get done? At different times. Let's say they can ask a coworker, can you, can you walk with me to my car? So they had let their supervisor, they let their supervisor know we had a plan in place.

31:21

They had a bad feeling that something was going on kept getting calls. Whatever the case may be, one of the another employee walked the person to their car. Sure enough, in the parking garage was the husband was waiting, or the ex-husband was waiting. So because there was two of them and the person that was with him was like, listen, you got to go. Like do not bring your nonsense, your BS, here. Like you got to go and it. It squashed the situation. He left and who knows what he was going to do If he would just want to talk to you I'm sorry, I love you or if it's, you know, he wants to get into a fight. But once he was confronted he left. But it was great because I think that if that woman wouldn't have that employee, wouldn't have said anything at work and then didn't have that plan in place and those steps in place when they got out to the car, who knows what would happen.

Karen Covy Host

32:15

You know yeah let's say you're in a situation, let's say that that woman had been alone, she didn't have the coworker and there's ex-husband and they get into a big fight. I want you to share, cause I know you and I have talked offline too and the tip, the tip from being in grade school, what you do to somebody, that even a woman can bring a guy down Like I thought this was brilliant.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

32:43

So I'm only five foot one, and when I would have to detain or arrest some of the individuals that I came in contact with, I would say 95% of them were taller than me. So there was a time or in a situation like this, you know, if, let's say, that woman gets into a physical altercation, you know, and the person's taller than them, one way to bring them down to your level is and it sounds so like juvenile, like because we were kids and we did this is you take your knee and you hit the back of their knee, which kind of makes them. You remember doing that.

33:23

I want to say kick, but kick is a bad word because you're using your knee, so you're taking your knee to the back of their knee and then it breaks them down and then you know at that point if they're in a physical altercation, my next knee is going into their groin area. You know, and I'm I mean, you're gonna have to hit with some power. You're gonna have to, like, you know, really do some, some strikes and then, as soon as you can, get away, get. You know, if your phone's in your hand. You know you can call for help and you can run back into the building, but I think that using something as simple as knocking your knee into their knee and bringing them down to your level is a is an easy enough.

Karen Covy Host

34:06

You know start that makes total sense and it's because, like, realistically, Hollywood aside, you're not going to bring them down and beat them up and they're going to be laying unconscious on the ground like the. The chances of that happening are really, really small. So it's like bring them down and run for crying out loud you know, I mean get out of the bad situation.

34:30

That's what I was always taught. It's like A try not to put yourself in the position in the first place and B if something happens and you're in a bad spot, get out. Don't try to fight your way out, just run your way out if you can.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

34:43

And I think too, like when, if people are traveling alone or walking and they don't feel uncomfortable, I think it's always good. I know we don't even use keys anymore, right, because our cars are have key fobs. But finding a key, grabbing your key chain and like holding your key in your hand like this or like this, in a situation where, if you have to use it, it's ready for you, right, yeah, that makes sense you don't have to get to that point, but at least you are prepared.

Karen Covy Host

35:11

Right, I was always taught and thank God I've never had to use it but that you lace your keys through your fingers and you hold it like this. And I mean because the point is you just want to get that surprise hit and then run Right and the other thing is to not to be afraid to  hit somebody, to get out of the situation. Because, especially as women like, for me to hit somebody is kind of like, ah, I, you know, I don't know if I can, but what would you say to women, like, what can they put in their head? So they've got the key and they don't have a problem like going for the eye or going for the throat or something, just to get out of there? Like, how do they get over their natural resistance of not wanting to hurt somebody?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

36:01

Well, they have to understand that their safety and their well-being is worth it. That I mean it's a priority, it's a non-negotiable it's a priority, it's worth it. And you might have to practice a few, like some people have never been into a fight before. And I'm not saying go get in a fight, but you might just have to practice a few. You know, if somebody was to come, I would do this or I would do that. You know, because we say pre-planned practice, response, right. If you are continuing, you practice a certain thing each way, then it starts to become a muscle memory, right, and it becomes natural for you. And I understand you're not going out there to with the intent of trying to hurt somebody, but if it's them or you, it's you, You're the priority.

Karen Covy Host

36:49

Yeah, and it's interesting because most women I know will have no problem going for the jugular if you try to hurt my kid, you know, but when it's you're trying to hurt me, there's a hesitation.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

37:04

Yeah, I honestly think that, because women take care of so many others all the time that they're always like it's the motherly thing, I'm going to take care of this person. I'm going to take care of this person, even like their health you think about. You know, they're always taking care of everyone else and then next thing you know they're exhausted and it's like there's got to be that balance, but not to get off the rails, but understanding that, like you should be treating your well-being, your peace of mind and your safety as if it was your child's or your best friends or your mom's or your grandparents. You know, because you are really, really, really, really worth it, and what would you do to ensure the safety and protection of all those people I just named? You would do anything right. So you really do deserve it and you are worth it. That's what I would tell women.

Karen Covy Host

38:01

I love that and I think that's a perfect place to just wrap this up. Thank you so much for all these tips. This has been so helpful and so instrumental and, you know, hopefully we all keep ourselves safe and we're never in that situation, but sometimes bad things happen and it's I love your perspective of how did you put it again

Catherine Trimboli Guest

Plan practice, make a pre-planned practice response.

Karen Covy Host

Yes, that thing. I think that you know there's a lot of sense to that and hopefully you never need it, but if you do need it, you have something to fall back on. So, thank you so much for this conversation. If people want to learn more about you and or they need, you know they want more tips or they need personal protection. Where can they find you? Where's the best place to get you?

Catherine Trimboli Guest

38:49

The best place to find me is on LinkedIn, and it's under my name, Catherine Trimboli.

Karen Covy Host

38:54

Perfect, Catherine. Thank you so much. I really appreciate this.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

38:58

Thank you so much for having me and I hope that you know just a few of the tips can help build on some skills and awareness and peace of mind for some people tips can help build on some skills and awareness and peace of mind.

Karen Covy Host

39:09

For some people, yeah, and if nothing else, it will help build that confidence that prevents things bad things from happening in the first place.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

39:14

Absolutely.

Karen Covy Host

39:15

So thank you so much, and, for those of you out there who are listening or who are watching, if you liked today's episode, if you want more of this kind of content, please do me a big favor. Give me a thumbs up like subscribe, and I look forward to talking with you again next time.

Catherine Trimboli Guest

39:31

Bye-bye.